I need drink in order to get with girls-but last week I drank so much that I passed out
Dear Gary, lately I have been hitting the drink to get some 'Dutch courage' on nights out, but this week I took it a little bit too far.
You see, there is this girl that I really like and I knew she was heading out at the weekend, but I managed to fall asleep before I could get a chance to talk to her. I entered the nightclub absolutely hammered on some serious drink and soon after a few more shots, I managed to fall asleep.
Turns out, one of my good friends took advantage of the situation and got with the girl that I liked. I had a row with him the next day, but he did not seem to care and told me that it was my own fault.
I do not know what I am angriest about; me falling asleep or him stealing my girl. What should I do and how can I cure my 'Dutch courage' problem.
Andy, 23
Dear Andy, you are one pathetic loser. Falling asleep in a nightclub is as low as it gets. Being thrown out of a club is even better than falling asleep in one.
But let me address the first problem and that is your drinking one. When you say serious drink, you actually probably mean a couple of Smirnoff Ices or too many Baileys because if you were this 'hardcore drinker' that you claim to be, then surely you would not fall asleep in a club.
I would say that the truth is this; You have been beaten around the head one too many times with the ugly stick when you were a child, hence you feel the need to drink to gain some much needed 'Dutch courage'.
There is no harm in that, sure half this town needs it really, including men and women so do not fault yourself there. But in future you must learn that more than five Smirnoff Ices is too much for your little lightweight self.
As for your friend, I cannot see what he has done wrong. Have you ever heard of the term, 'You Snooze, You Lose' because it perfectly applies to your situation at the weekend.
You fell asleep so technically he did no harm, unless that is you called 'Dibs' which by all accounts is law. You have not mentioned it in the letter so I presume you didn't so you cannot have any qualms about that one. You dug yourself in a hole by falling asleep and your mate certainly scored the goal you were hoping for.
It happens but that is life. What you need to do is re-bound and sort yourself out. As for the sleeping problem, there is this little gem on the alcohol market called Buckfast.
It is a wine, rich in flavour. It's a colossus in the wine market and I suggest you try it before nights as I guarantee you; after a bottle of this, you will never fall asleep in a club again. You will be the life and soul of the party. However, it may get you thrown out of the club, but as I said, it is better to be thrown out than hauled out half asleep.
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Sunday 05 February 2012
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